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When will I start having relationships?

• As you become more mature, you will start to be emotionally and sexually attracted to others and interested in having relationships.
• You may be attracted to the opposite sex, same sex, or both sexes.
• Whatever your sexuality (straight, gay, lesbian, or bisexual), it is completely normal and it is likely that at some stage you will meet someone who is interested in you too.

Is it normal to have a crush?

• Most people experience having a crush on someone.
• Having a crush is when you are very attracted to a person, think about them all the time and feel like you are in love with them.
• Having a crush can feel exciting, especially when you see, speak to or think about the object of your affection.
• Crushes can make you feel sad especially if they aren’t interested in you or there is no chance of meeting them, if you have a crush on a celebrity.
• This is a normal part of growing up, and as you go through life you will probably have crushes on lots of people.

Will you go out with me?

• If you fancy someone and think you would like to have a relationship with them, then a first step would be getting to know them better.
• One way of doing this is to ask them out on a date, so that you can spend time together and see how you get on.
• It can be really nerve-wracking asking someone out, but the worst that can happen is that they will say no.
• Don’t worry if they do, you will meet someone who is interested in you at some point, and maybe they will ask you out!

How do I find that special person, and what can I say to them?

• Go out there! You will never find true love if you stay in your bedroom.
• Find your courage – what is there to lose? Walk tall, be confident.
• Check their body language, and watch out for your own.
• Go for it!

Things to avoid:

• Cheesy chat-up lines
• Being fake
• Getting drunk
• Tripping over!

What about break-ups?

• Experiencing the end of a relationship is something that most people will go through at some point.
• When a relationship ends you might feel sad, worried, angry, relieved, insecure or upset. This is normal and it may be a few weeks or months before these feelings go away.
• Talking to friends and family about how you are feeling can help.
• Giving yourself time to get over the breakup is important.
• Try not to rush into new relationships until you feel ready, but remember that there will be someone out there who suits you.

What if I am being treated badly?

• Everyone has the right to a loving relationship, and if you feel like you are being treated badly it's important to know that this is not right.
• If someone is hurting you sexually, physically, or emotionally that is called abuse and help is available.

If you have a question or you are unsure about anything then ask a Talksafe Counsellor or Peer Mentor.

Links

TheSite: Sex and Relationships

Brook: Relationships

Last review: 02/06/11 - Next review: 02/06/13