article page

What is being lesbian?

If you are lesbian you are a girl or woman who is romantically and sexually attracted to other girls or women.

How do I know if I’m lesbian?

• Some people know from a young age that they are lesbian.
• Some people don’t know until they get older and start thinking about relationships.
• Some girls realise they prefer girls although they have previously been attracted to boys.

Is it normal?

Growing up lesbian is not always easy and you might feel worried about your sexual orientation. Being attracted to someone of the same sex is completely normal. Remember, it is your sexuality and it is up to you how you define it.

What if people treat me differently?

Sometimes people discriminate against lesbians. This means they may be unkind or have ideas that are wrong, for example some people think all lesbians are masculine or that it is not normal to be a lesbian. This is called homophobia, and it is important to know that people who think this are wrong. You can get help with homophobia at the Young People's UK Actionline.

Can I get married and have children if I’m lesbian?

People often think that being lesbian means you can’t have a family or get married. In fact, this is not true and plenty of gay men and women have children naturally, foster or adopt. Also since 2005 lesbian couples have been able to enter into civil partnership, giving them most of the same rights and responsibilities that married straight couples have.

Who can I talk to?

Some people find that joining a group for gay, lesbian and bisexual young people really helps. This will give you the chance to meet other lesbian young people who will probably understand any worries or problems you might be having. There will also be qualified youth workers you can talk to who can help you deal with a range of issues like coming out, coping with bullies and safer sex.

You can find a list of youth groups at the Queer Youth Network.

You can also talk to one of our Talksafe Counsellors or Peer Mentors.

Links

NHS Choices: Am I gay, lesbian or bisexual?

Queer Youth Network

Last review: 01/06/11 - Next review: 01/06/13